Preparing for Pregnancy

Pregnancy is one of the hardest & most natural things we do as women. To share your body with another growing body is both beautiful & brutal. In a perfect world we would be taught as young daughters how to support our bodies correctly to one day prepare for life to flourish inside us.

There are countless ways to prepare for pregnancy. You can read all the books, consult all the doctors or you can do nothing at all. Either way, the result is a baby. Although you do not have to prepare for pregnancy, in my experience it was the best thing I did for myself & my daughter.

When I met my boyfriend, I knew we would have children together. After a couple years of dating & the talk of children becoming more present, I decided to clean up my body. I slowed down on the drinking, stopped smoking weed & tried to eat more mindful, nutrient dense meals. I focused on bettering myself & calming my mind. I dealt with my traumas & hang ups; I healed my mother wounds. I started lifting weights & being more present. Birth podcasts & wild mothering became my favorite things to listen to & read. Women inspired me. Mothers are the center of all things. I listened deeper to moms & asked all the questions. I paid more attention to children & learned to listen to them.

With the busy life of being a hairstylist, supplementing my meals became the best way I could get nutrients in. I cooked all meats & vegetables in bone broth or added bone broth powder to rice & grains. I added whey protein powder, mushroom powder & acerola powder to my smoothies. I ate fish, avocados, eggs & bone-in meats regularly. I focused on eating a big breakfast, (especially the last couple months of drinking coffee & while I was weaning myself off). I used all the tips & tricks to try to make every meal as nutritious as possible. Keeping my blood sugar regulated to support my adrenals was the best way to keep my stress hormones in check & feeling good all day long. Eating smaller meals more frequently seemed to be the trick for me.  I also incorporated a balanced bed-time snack to have a good night’s sleep every night.

Calming my mind was no easy task. The most helpful thing I did was quit drinking coffee. Once I had completely weaned myself off caffeine, I realized my mind was running in circles daily. Life became simpler, I was less reactive & I started to go about life a little slower but more focused. My conversations were deeper, my mind was present & I slept better. Although our society looks at smoking weed as calming the mind, for me it did the opposite. I became too reliant & after quitting I quickly learned how narrow my mind had become. Within a few months my thought processes became stronger & I was dreaming again.

We all have hang-ups or traumas & we always will. As life goes on, we do our best at dealing with these things & finding the tools to help. I started to sit with myself. Turned the tv, podcasts, music & mind off. Sat there in silence & dealt with what came up. All the insecurities, the to-do lists, the circling thoughts in my mind. After I faced some of what had been unknowingly bothering me for years, I decided to not play victim anymore. I took a course on conscious leadership & changed the way I thought. For everything else, I learned to let go.

Healing the mother wound for daughters is important. Whether you have a great relationship with your mom or not it is important to explore this wound & get to the center of it. Most women are unaware of this wound & it can sometimes disguise itself until you yourself are a mother. For me that meant forgiving my own mother & myself, facing the past I had with her & starting a new relationship with her. On the other side of healing is the best relationship I have with any other human. There is no better gift in life than experiencing motherhood with my own mother by my side, other than my daughter of course.

Movement is so important in every stage of life. It is crucial to have a strong body before getting pregnant. Having the strength to support the extra weight makes for an easier pregnancy & a healthy baby. Not to mention, if you plan to have a homebirth like I did, you’ll be happy you incorporated movement when you’re in the throes of labor. Getting outside & taking a daily walk has proven to be good for not only your body but your mind (& your dog!) You’ll also be amazed at what a 10 minute walk a day could do for you.

Doing the research & finding out what you want & don’t want for your pregnancy is just as important as everything else. Don’t just blindly trust your “health provider.” You are the biggest advocate for yourself & the life you are about to create. Start now educating yourself about what kind of pregnancy you want, how birth unfolds, how to support a newborn & everything in between. Once your baby is earth side you’ll quickly learn as most mothers say, the days are long, but the years are short. There couldn’t be a truer statement to motherhood. Time moves so fast it’s unfathomable. You won’t be sorry you advocated & educate yourself.

Taking responsibility for your health & your children’s health is one of the most empowering things we do as mothers. You quickly learn after birthing your child that everything lies on you as the mother & the fierce mama bear is born herself. There is true freedom & grace that comes with radical responsibility.